The Broken Window Theory

I, Chris, have been reading "The Tipping Point" by Malcom Gladwell for the last month. It's a book about epidemics; how to start them; key aspects to epidemics; and so on and so forth. I remember my dad reading it a long time ago and I found it at a garage sale this summer for 10¢. It has been a good read and I would recommend the book. The end is a little slower but the first 3/4 of the book is awesome. Get the paperback copy with the "Afterward" in it. 

In the book it talks about "The Broken Window Theory". In a nut shell the theory is: if there is a broken window that goes unrepaired for a time (or if there is garbage laying around or graffiti on walls or an area is generally unkept) it encourages more crime because people assume no one cares about the place and therefore it's less likely they'll get caught or confronted if they commit a crime there. For instance, a broken window might encourage someone to break another window; which leads to someone breaking into the place; which leads to graffiti; which leads to more damage; which leads to squatters; which leads to drugs; etc, etc. Basically, a broken window unfixed can, eventually, be the cause of a whole neighbourhood becoming a "bad area to live in".   

We have been trying to conquer some of the issues in the school and it has been very frustrating but we are learning that it's about us trying to model good behaviors and teaching this crazy idea called "RESPECT".  Respect for the school. Respect for the teachers. Respect for the other kids. Respect. It is a great school but like all great things there can also be improvements. Servants Heart Ministries and the director of the school are committed to make those improvements happen through the "little" things like picking up the garbage around the lot and not drawing on desks, walls, tables, chairs, etc. We are trying to stop the broken window theory from playing out at the outset.  Little by little we are trying to make a difference. 

NEW NEWS!!! The couple that have been down here since late September and have been teaching an English class (mixed with teenagers and adults) are leaving for Canada as of tomorrow and the students still want to continue learning english.  So, starting tomorrow I, now Keeleah, will be taking over the English class which meets Tuesday and Thursday's from 2:30-4pm.  My teaching career has advanced... lol!  I have no idea, really, what I am doing except that I do know how to speak English.  I am sure it will be fun and interesting. 

I have also taken on a counseling role for three additional students (plus our sponsor girl). I will be meeting with them each on a weekly basis to discus how life is going and to give them a chance to talk about what is troubling them or what they are trying to change in their lives. Although I work solely with adults in Canada for my job the experience there has helped me be a better listener here. That's all these kids need. Someone to listen and give some extra encouragement. I am hoping to make a big difference in the lives of the kids.  

ps. We are back in Canada on TUESDAY !!! (for a week) crazy :)

SLEEP!!!!!!!!

I have titled this blog "sleep" because I just woke up.... and I want more of it. haha.  Abriel is really not a fan of proper sleep as of late.... well, proper sleep at-least.  Since we have been here it has been a battle to have a full night of sleep.  I guess since we had a baby that pretty much slept through the night at 2 months we were not expecting this lack of sleep.  Since we have been here Abriel wakes up every 3 hours on average every night.  A couple nights a week she wakes up every 2 hours.  Always to eat and go back to sleep.  We tried three nights of only feeding her every four hours and simply rocking her back to sleep in between feedings but it didn't stick as well as we would have liked it to. I am okay with this, as I know feeding is good for her, but I am more worried that she isn't getting proper sleep. Oh, and a full night of sleep wouldn't hurt us either. haha.

Anyways, life here is really starting to feel normal. It doesn't feel like our permanent home but it is starting to feel like one of our homes.  We have had a lot of people asking us if we will be coming back down here to live permanently and as of right now we don't feel that a permanent stay is in the near future but we do feel like our time here is preparing us for something.  We have always been looking for some "reasons" or the "purpose" of why we are down here now.  We have had some great and big moments that have shown us "this is why you are here".  Even though it's been challenging to be away from our friends and family it's good to know we are being used.

For us right now the biggest thing on our brain is our sponsor girl, Maria. Due to her home life we have decided to try and hang out with her as much as possible.  The situation is delicate and we are trying to avoid ostracizing her from her family. The details are upsetting and frustrating. Maria and I will be meeting at-least once a week with the help of our translator, Jessica, just to give her an opportunity to talk about things and share.  After our meeting last week she said she felt better talking about her problems. I have decided not to share those details as it is not my life to share.  Maybe after asking permission, one day, it will be shared.  I know some of the things are just normal Dominican life situations for a certain class of people but it doesn't make it right to me. On Saturday we brought her over to our house to swim in the pool.  We had to buy her a bathing suit first since she didn't own one.  We then found out that it was her first time in a pool.  She is 11 and very sweet.  We then found out she had only been to the beach once in her life...... crazy!  We then brought her to the grocery store and cooked dinner (side note: be prepared to move outside your comfort zone when you allow others to pick the food you are going to eat. We said we wanted chicken and she could pick any vegetable she wanted. She wanted eggplant.).  We then taught her the game Uno with our very limited and broken Spanish.  It was a special day!!

Earlier in the week, after I met with Maria and gathered some information, I came back and shared the info with Chris and Donna.  Donna said, "do you want to adopt her?"  Our first instinct is to just pull her out of the situation but it's complicated and that's not necessarily the best thing to do. That's why we have decided to just hang out with her as often as possible and pour as much love into her life as we can.  After hearing the word "adoption" Chris and I have been talking about it a lot.  Now, don't start the rumor mills that we are adopting. At this point we are not adopting but we have talked about it in the past and we are open to it in the future.  It's so crazy to me and it would change our lives!

Silly us! Forgot to talk pictures of our hang out time last week but here is a picture from a few weeks ago!

Frank Arthur Bishop

Frank Arthur Bishop
July 9, 1927 - November 4, 2011

My Grandpa's funeral is today. It's weird being here, in the Dominican, getting ready to teach 6 kids the Spanish alphabet when my family is preparing for a service to say goodbye to a father, grandfather and husband. He had many months of sickness and we knew that a day like this would come but it's still sad when it does. Before we left for the Dominican we went to visit him and we got to say goodbye to him properly and pray with him one last time and laugh and joke around with him. He was always joking around. We knew that it would probably be the last time we saw him on this earth and on Friday that was confirmed.


My grandpa and grandma Bishop were a HUGE part of the reason I believe what I believe today. They were the ones who started going to church although they weren't raised in the church. They then took my parents (who grew up in the church) who then took us (who have grown up in the church) and now we are taking our daughter. What an impact on a family tree because of their decision to pursue God. I am truly blessed beyond measure because of their choices in life and the way they chose to live.

A few things I will always remember about my grandpa:

A song my grandpa frequently sang to each and every one of his grandchildren goes like this:
(sung in complete love)

          "Chris Edwards" (insert any grandchild's name) is no good,
          is no good,
          is no good.
          "Chris Edwards" is no good.
          Chop him up for fire wood.

Although a little morbid it was a fantastically fun song and we loved it.

Another thing that will always be remembered was his love of the garden. He took amazing pride in his roses and other flowers. When we would go and visit him he would point out the different flowers and tell us which ones were doing well that year and which ones the backyard critters were eating or ruining. He knew every type of bird on the planet and would teach us how the different birds constructed their nests and how the different birds would interact with the others. He even built a bird house that was plexiglass on one side so he could see how the birds lived. He would laugh and laugh at the birds and their different personalities. When my grandma and him had to move out of their house into the retirement home (and hospital respectively) he told the family to go into the house and take whatever they think they could use. I found a pair of binoculars in his closet and took them with a few other items. The binoculars will always be a reminder of him and his bird watching. He took time to remind us that God watched even the sparrows (one of his favorites), a gentle reminder that God was always watching us and loved us tremendously.

My grandpa had the work ethic of an ox on steroids. Recently, he needed to change the windows in his whole house. He looked around and got some prices and then hired someone to change the giant bay window in the front of his house solely because he couldn't lift it into place himself. He then measured, bought and fully installed the new windows in the rest of his house himself. That way he knew it would be done right and for a fraction of the cost. He fixed his own lawnmower, built shelves, re-shingled his own roof (when he was over 65) and any other thing he needed fixed around the house. The man knew how to work. He knew how to keep what little he had in good working condition and he knew how to save. He knew the value of money. He was the direct opposite of lazy.

Coupled very tightly with his desire and will to do things himself was his strength. I kid you not, and although not proven, before my grandpa took really sick (last year) my grandpa could fairly easily destroy ANYONE in the family in a fight. His nickname growing up was "One Punch". Supposedly, the story goes, when he was younger he got in only one fight and with one punch he knocked the other kid clear off his feet, across the dirt road and unconscious. I'm not sure how much of it is true or how much of it is exaggerated but what a great story! To tell you the truth it's a believable story too! It was fun to try and "hurt" grandpa by squeezing his hand too hard when you greeted him (after a huge hug of course). He would look at you with a small grin on his face and say something to the effect of "are you ready?" (which of course you always thought you were until...) he would then squeeze your hand not in a way that hurt but somehow he would move your knuckles in a way that sent shock waves through your whole arm. No matter how old he got he always won that game. When we were younger he used to swing us on his leg (while singing the firewood song) or when there were more of us we used to cling to both of his legs as he walked around the house. He told stories of taking ALL the neighbourhood kids on "helicopter rides" where he would pick them up and swing them around his head until they were too dizzy to stand up. The kids would line up again and again and squeal with joy when it was their turn. Even with all that strength the thing that will stick with me is the fact that he NEVER used it to hurt anyone or to demand power over anyone, ever, period. He used his strength to do productive things and things that brought joy to others. With his great strength came extremely patience and kindness.            

He loved his family without limitations. He told us all the time that he was praying for us everyday and although lots of people say that I really believed him. My grandma and him were always ready with some short bread cookies (the best in the world) and bread with molasses and butter (depending on which way you ate is "grandma's way" or "grandpa's way" the butter would go on before or after the molasses). He never said he didn't have time for us. He was never upset even if we showed up completely unannounced. He really was the head of his household not in a dominating way but in a loving, example setting way. He was a man who was not ashamed of his faith and made it clear to all those around him whom he served and followed. He made it easy to be around him and to feel loved. He shared new insights into the faith we shared whenever he had them. He brought wisdom to ordinary everyday things such as gardening and devotions.

His funeral starts in one hour from now and although I can't physically be there I am there in thought. I haven't cried in a long, long time but writing this has brought me to tears.

There are very few people that can be called truly great people but my life seems to full of them. Frank Bishop, my awesome grandfather, was easily one of them.

I will miss him dearly.

Sister love

It's been three (3) days since my sister Shené and our friend Teleisha left for Canada. It was a fun visit packed full of new adventures. We have already talked about our zip lining fun and I honestly thought that would be the most adventurous thing I would do while down here.... but I was wrong.  On Sunday we went waterfall jumping!! For $15 we got to jump, slide and swim down 27 waterfalls and it included lunch!!! It was scary but amazing! Chris didn't come because he stayed behind and watched Abriel (such a good man).  It was sooo good I plan on taking Chris there before we leave.

Shené and Teleisha have both been to the DR on a missions trip 3 years ago. That was mostly a working trip so this time was a little different. We did some fun things and did some work. I think they appreciated the mix. They came to our tutoring sessions and met the students, they helped with some painting of the new school and we showed them around some villages they have never been to before. I sometimes feel weird just showing people some of the places because we are showing them peoples real lives.... not a museum or something.  Sometimes people can get a sense that if they have seen it or held some kids hand then they have made a difference and although it's a good start and it is important to see that the poverty is real you can't stop at just seeing.

We are so grateful for the time to spend with family and friends from back home! It means a lot to have people come down and hang out with us and see what we do first hand. You guys rock.

Something we have been facing since we started tutoring is a feeling of helplessness in some of our students lives.  A few of them have shared some things that are going on in their home lives, things like: no food to eat, being abused (physically and mentally) and having to work six or eight hours everyday after school and on weekends when they are in grades one to three.  It's a different life.... a different world.... a different culture and the rules of home don't apply here. I just want to pull them out of the situation and "save" them but it's not that easy.  We have also found out our sponsor girl, Maria, is having a hard time at school as a result of her home life.  She as made some accusations..... (ones that have made me cry and sicken me). We are going to be meeting with her and the school director to try to sort some stuff out and get to the bottom of things. We will update when we know more but if you are a praying person these kids need our prayers... and these parents need a wake up call.