One Less Tooth for Maria

We have been back in the Domincan for just over a week now and our trip home seems like a very distant memory. It’s weird how you count down to things and wait for certain moments in your life to happen, then they happen, and they are done. (I know, mind blowing idea, haha).  How do I get more out of my life and more out of the things I do so they matter more? So when they pass they have had an impact on someone or something so it’s more lasting than a day?  Now maybe that’s a little more mind blowing.

This past Saturday we took Maria to a free dental clinic.  It’s a place called “Monkey Jungle”. When our siblings were here we went zip lining and fed the monkeys at the same place. We have recently found out they run the zip lining to make profits in order to offer their free medical and dentistry clinics to those in the Dominican Republic that could never afford a doctor or dentist visit otherwise; a very cool and smart idea. On their website there is a clip from a show on CBS called “Around the World For Free”. Monkey Jungle was the feature of that particular episode and the owner of the business offered to fly the girl to her next destination for free on his private jet.  So, I am assuming Monkey Jungle does very well in the money department. When I called them to find out when they run the free clinic (since Maria desperately needed to see a dentist) I could not get through any of the numbers provided but I did some extra digging and found the number for their American office in Dallas, Texas. A man picked up who sounded very similar to the voice I heard on the T.V show clip I had just watched.  I asked him if he knew the clinic days and hours and he said, “Is it for you to access?” I told him, “No, we are bringing our sponsor girl to the dentist.” He then replied with, “OH! I thought you sounded like the wrong colour. We only serve the poor.”  I was really taken back by that statement and was unsure how to respond to it.  I shared what he had said with Chris, Phil and Donna who also thought it was a strange thing to say. Regardless, we took Maria up to the clinic at 9am where there was already a line to see the doctor and the dentist.  They had some great equipment and they are really filling a need of the people and providing a great service.  We watched a couple people go in and could watch the work being done in the dentist chair.  No one seemed in pain and it seemed very quick and professional.  We were very impressed. There were a lot of individual people ahead of us as well as a large family of 10 or so but we were not sure if they were waiting for the dentist or the doctor.  I over heard one of the staff ask another staff member to tell all of us to have a seat because we would probably be here for most of the day.  As we waited I saw the man I had seen on T.V and, I’m  assuming, the man I talked to on the phone.  He came over and greeted us and said, “You must have been the lady I talked to on the phone.”  I said, “yes”.  He told us he had just flown back to the Domincan yesterday.  He asked if we had been waiting long and if we knew how much longer.  I said I didn’t know.  He then went and talked with some staff and organized some things, and helped out with some cleaning up.  Then a staff member came over and said that we were next. I didn’t think much of it. As she said Maria went in next. While she was in the chair I thought about it more. It really seemed weird that we were next.  As I looked around I noticed the others who were waiting get more annoyed.  Then we heard a visibly upset women say something in Spanish to the effect of, “porque ellos Blanco” (because they are white).  We don’t know for sure but from what we can gather it seems like the man bumped us up the line.  It was such an awkward moment when we realized what had happened and Maria was already done.  We got one of her teeth removed and we were told to come back next week for her to have one more removed.

What a mixture of emotions we had.  To be honest, it was nice to have been able to get in quick so that we could get on with our day and not have to wait any longer but it felt very wrong to get special treatment because of  (possibly) our skin colour.  Chris described it as a kind of “reverse racism”. Either way we feel faced with an ethical dilemma.  We left and the man said his goodbyes and we talked about it all the way home.

We will be going back on Saturday and we will see what happens then. Maybe it was all in our heads. Maybe we just misunderstood how things are run or who was actually there for the dentist that day. Or maybe we were right. Let’s hope not. They are doing great work. 

Our Home Away From Home Away From Home

Last week was C-R-A-Z-Y! We left the relatively warm Dominican Republic and headed back home to Canada for my sisters wedding. Here's the rundown:

Tuesday afternoon we boarded a plane and headed back. Abriel has, in the past, been great to fly with because she sleeps for 85% of the flight. This flight was a little different. We left at 5:30pm which means we was still awake (and by "awake" I mean "wired"). She is almost always a happy kid and she is almost always bursting with energy. The plane ride was no different. She squirmed and yelled (in a friendly manner) to other passengers, played with every toy she had in her diaper bag, chewed on the seat in front of us, watched what was going on out the window, ate snacks, played "take daddy's glasses off" a hundred times, watched part of a Baby Einstein video and became fascinated with the little fan thing above the seat. Then the seat belt sign came on and we were ready to take off. This was going to be a long flight.

We made it through the flight with very few problems by alternately taking turns holding Abriel and resting. My dad and sister graciously picked us up from the airport and drove us home so we could sleep in our unnervingly quiet house. There was night and there was morning light. The first day. And so began the chaos.

Wednesday morning we got up and got ready to take Abriel to her doctors appointment for 10am. We didn't have time the night before to grab any groceries so after a quick bite to eat at Tim Horton's (a side note: Dominican coffee has ruined Keeleah's Tim Horton's experience) it was off to see the doctor. Upon arriving at the doctors office we found out that our appointment was for Thursday morning at 10am. Thinking back to early fall before we had left we remembered that we had said it would be better to get the appointment for Thursday so we could sleep in on Wednesday after our flight and first night home. Oops! We went to the seamstress who was making Keeleahs dress for the wedding and did a fitting and then went to Keeleah's parents house and had lunch. Wednesday night our good friends Wayne and Mellisa came over and brought us dinner. It was so good to see them and the food was delicious!

Thursday morning looked surprisingly similar to Wednesday morning (go figure) except that I dropped Keeleah off at her parents before going to the doctors so she could make some last minute preparations for Thursday night and finish a few errands we had to do while we were back. The doctor let us know that Abriel seemed great. She was still off the charts for height and had an average sized head and her weight was about right for her age and height. That's always good to hear.  We also got a few hours of snow when we were home. Even though Abriel didn't actually use the snow suit she tried it on for when we return back to Canada in February. Still a little too big.

Thursday evening was Carrie's bachelorette party. The evening started off with mani-pedi's (a term I have become familiar with since being in a serious relationship) for Carrie, Corinne (my other sister), my mom and Keeleah. After that there was a scavenger hunt for Carrie to pick up a few "items needed for a successful wedding night". Then the girls met up with a bunch of Carrie's friends and family at Kelsey's for dinner and dessert.

Friday morning was picking up the (now finished) dress and decorating the reception hall. It was fun getting everything set for the wedding. We got to joke around with our family and meet some of Dan's family. The hall looked awesome by the afternoon! Then it was off to the church for the rehearsal. Everything went smoothly at the rehearsal and soon we were sitting down to the largest rehearsal dinner I've ever been a part of. The Dragos's and Edwards' make for one big group of people.

Saturday morning was the start of the main event! Keeleah went over to my parents house around 7:30am to start her hair and makeup. Tim (my brother) and Ashley went over at around 8am so Tim oculd get his hair and makeup done as well (just kidding, Tim didn't need his hair done!). Actually they made us breakfast and it was fantastic. The whole family sat down together and ate at the table. I love those times.

After hair and makeup and gel and hairspray and shaving and eating and laughing and getting the dress on and packing the cars and everything else that happens on a wedding day morning we went and took some pictures.... OUTSIDE! It was cold but I think the pictures are going to turn out really cool. Then it was off to the church for the ceremony and onto the reception.


The reception speeches were very nice and I almost cried at Carrie and Dan's. They are nice people and I'm glad they are married. The dance consisted of half of the original Edwards family dancing like crazy with the "add ons" leading the way (Keeleah and Nathan). If there was a contest for who could make up the most unique dances I think Keeleah would take the cake. And if ever there is a "Cotton Eyed Joe" contest my money is on Nathan for winning. That boy knows how to Cotton Eyed Joe it up!

After the evening festivities were done and the hall was cleaned up we had A LOT of food left over. My parents asked us to take some and we brought it to the Salvation Army downtown. The men of the drop in centre were so thankful and we even over heard one the guys say "I haven't had cheesecake in a long time.... and it's my favorite!". It's nice to be able to give something away of quality instead of just a can of pickled asperagus heads that have been in the back of your pantry for three years and you're never going to eat them anyway because they are disgusting. I would encourage you to donate things or food  that you actually enjoy wearing or eating because chances are the people receiving the clothes or food you're giving away actually have to wear it or eat it. Anyways, that's just a suggestion.

Sunday morning we were back at Community Church. I have mentioned it before and I'll mention it again: I love Community Church. They gave us some time to talk about what we were up to in the D.R and several people talked to us afterwards and gave us words of encouragement. It's great knowing that we have people behind us cheering us on with what we are trying to do down here. Thanks Community!

We went to my parents for a quick lunch (left overs from the wedding) so they could say their goodbyes before we left again and then we headed to the annual friends Christmas party. We have a great group of friends and it's easy hanging around them and talking to them and just being with them. We thought there was a secret Santa exchange happening but apparently there wasn't so in typical Chris and Keeleah fashion we had a game tournament in order to find out who would take home our secret Santa gifts. God times.

Monday we got to hang out with the Matta's and play a few games with them. They bought us Swiss Chalet (my favorite). They even offered to watch Abriel while Keeleah and I went out and got a few more things we needed before we came back to the Dominican. That was good. I'm glad Abriel will grow up with the love of not only her parents but also all her aunts and uncles and all her grandparents.
  

The Broken Window Theory

I, Chris, have been reading "The Tipping Point" by Malcom Gladwell for the last month. It's a book about epidemics; how to start them; key aspects to epidemics; and so on and so forth. I remember my dad reading it a long time ago and I found it at a garage sale this summer for 10¢. It has been a good read and I would recommend the book. The end is a little slower but the first 3/4 of the book is awesome. Get the paperback copy with the "Afterward" in it. 

In the book it talks about "The Broken Window Theory". In a nut shell the theory is: if there is a broken window that goes unrepaired for a time (or if there is garbage laying around or graffiti on walls or an area is generally unkept) it encourages more crime because people assume no one cares about the place and therefore it's less likely they'll get caught or confronted if they commit a crime there. For instance, a broken window might encourage someone to break another window; which leads to someone breaking into the place; which leads to graffiti; which leads to more damage; which leads to squatters; which leads to drugs; etc, etc. Basically, a broken window unfixed can, eventually, be the cause of a whole neighbourhood becoming a "bad area to live in".   

We have been trying to conquer some of the issues in the school and it has been very frustrating but we are learning that it's about us trying to model good behaviors and teaching this crazy idea called "RESPECT".  Respect for the school. Respect for the teachers. Respect for the other kids. Respect. It is a great school but like all great things there can also be improvements. Servants Heart Ministries and the director of the school are committed to make those improvements happen through the "little" things like picking up the garbage around the lot and not drawing on desks, walls, tables, chairs, etc. We are trying to stop the broken window theory from playing out at the outset.  Little by little we are trying to make a difference. 

NEW NEWS!!! The couple that have been down here since late September and have been teaching an English class (mixed with teenagers and adults) are leaving for Canada as of tomorrow and the students still want to continue learning english.  So, starting tomorrow I, now Keeleah, will be taking over the English class which meets Tuesday and Thursday's from 2:30-4pm.  My teaching career has advanced... lol!  I have no idea, really, what I am doing except that I do know how to speak English.  I am sure it will be fun and interesting. 

I have also taken on a counseling role for three additional students (plus our sponsor girl). I will be meeting with them each on a weekly basis to discus how life is going and to give them a chance to talk about what is troubling them or what they are trying to change in their lives. Although I work solely with adults in Canada for my job the experience there has helped me be a better listener here. That's all these kids need. Someone to listen and give some extra encouragement. I am hoping to make a big difference in the lives of the kids.  

ps. We are back in Canada on TUESDAY !!! (for a week) crazy :)

SLEEP!!!!!!!!

I have titled this blog "sleep" because I just woke up.... and I want more of it. haha.  Abriel is really not a fan of proper sleep as of late.... well, proper sleep at-least.  Since we have been here it has been a battle to have a full night of sleep.  I guess since we had a baby that pretty much slept through the night at 2 months we were not expecting this lack of sleep.  Since we have been here Abriel wakes up every 3 hours on average every night.  A couple nights a week she wakes up every 2 hours.  Always to eat and go back to sleep.  We tried three nights of only feeding her every four hours and simply rocking her back to sleep in between feedings but it didn't stick as well as we would have liked it to. I am okay with this, as I know feeding is good for her, but I am more worried that she isn't getting proper sleep. Oh, and a full night of sleep wouldn't hurt us either. haha.

Anyways, life here is really starting to feel normal. It doesn't feel like our permanent home but it is starting to feel like one of our homes.  We have had a lot of people asking us if we will be coming back down here to live permanently and as of right now we don't feel that a permanent stay is in the near future but we do feel like our time here is preparing us for something.  We have always been looking for some "reasons" or the "purpose" of why we are down here now.  We have had some great and big moments that have shown us "this is why you are here".  Even though it's been challenging to be away from our friends and family it's good to know we are being used.

For us right now the biggest thing on our brain is our sponsor girl, Maria. Due to her home life we have decided to try and hang out with her as much as possible.  The situation is delicate and we are trying to avoid ostracizing her from her family. The details are upsetting and frustrating. Maria and I will be meeting at-least once a week with the help of our translator, Jessica, just to give her an opportunity to talk about things and share.  After our meeting last week she said she felt better talking about her problems. I have decided not to share those details as it is not my life to share.  Maybe after asking permission, one day, it will be shared.  I know some of the things are just normal Dominican life situations for a certain class of people but it doesn't make it right to me. On Saturday we brought her over to our house to swim in the pool.  We had to buy her a bathing suit first since she didn't own one.  We then found out that it was her first time in a pool.  She is 11 and very sweet.  We then found out she had only been to the beach once in her life...... crazy!  We then brought her to the grocery store and cooked dinner (side note: be prepared to move outside your comfort zone when you allow others to pick the food you are going to eat. We said we wanted chicken and she could pick any vegetable she wanted. She wanted eggplant.).  We then taught her the game Uno with our very limited and broken Spanish.  It was a special day!!

Earlier in the week, after I met with Maria and gathered some information, I came back and shared the info with Chris and Donna.  Donna said, "do you want to adopt her?"  Our first instinct is to just pull her out of the situation but it's complicated and that's not necessarily the best thing to do. That's why we have decided to just hang out with her as often as possible and pour as much love into her life as we can.  After hearing the word "adoption" Chris and I have been talking about it a lot.  Now, don't start the rumor mills that we are adopting. At this point we are not adopting but we have talked about it in the past and we are open to it in the future.  It's so crazy to me and it would change our lives!

Silly us! Forgot to talk pictures of our hang out time last week but here is a picture from a few weeks ago!

Frank Arthur Bishop

Frank Arthur Bishop
July 9, 1927 - November 4, 2011

My Grandpa's funeral is today. It's weird being here, in the Dominican, getting ready to teach 6 kids the Spanish alphabet when my family is preparing for a service to say goodbye to a father, grandfather and husband. He had many months of sickness and we knew that a day like this would come but it's still sad when it does. Before we left for the Dominican we went to visit him and we got to say goodbye to him properly and pray with him one last time and laugh and joke around with him. He was always joking around. We knew that it would probably be the last time we saw him on this earth and on Friday that was confirmed.


My grandpa and grandma Bishop were a HUGE part of the reason I believe what I believe today. They were the ones who started going to church although they weren't raised in the church. They then took my parents (who grew up in the church) who then took us (who have grown up in the church) and now we are taking our daughter. What an impact on a family tree because of their decision to pursue God. I am truly blessed beyond measure because of their choices in life and the way they chose to live.

A few things I will always remember about my grandpa:

A song my grandpa frequently sang to each and every one of his grandchildren goes like this:
(sung in complete love)

          "Chris Edwards" (insert any grandchild's name) is no good,
          is no good,
          is no good.
          "Chris Edwards" is no good.
          Chop him up for fire wood.

Although a little morbid it was a fantastically fun song and we loved it.

Another thing that will always be remembered was his love of the garden. He took amazing pride in his roses and other flowers. When we would go and visit him he would point out the different flowers and tell us which ones were doing well that year and which ones the backyard critters were eating or ruining. He knew every type of bird on the planet and would teach us how the different birds constructed their nests and how the different birds would interact with the others. He even built a bird house that was plexiglass on one side so he could see how the birds lived. He would laugh and laugh at the birds and their different personalities. When my grandma and him had to move out of their house into the retirement home (and hospital respectively) he told the family to go into the house and take whatever they think they could use. I found a pair of binoculars in his closet and took them with a few other items. The binoculars will always be a reminder of him and his bird watching. He took time to remind us that God watched even the sparrows (one of his favorites), a gentle reminder that God was always watching us and loved us tremendously.

My grandpa had the work ethic of an ox on steroids. Recently, he needed to change the windows in his whole house. He looked around and got some prices and then hired someone to change the giant bay window in the front of his house solely because he couldn't lift it into place himself. He then measured, bought and fully installed the new windows in the rest of his house himself. That way he knew it would be done right and for a fraction of the cost. He fixed his own lawnmower, built shelves, re-shingled his own roof (when he was over 65) and any other thing he needed fixed around the house. The man knew how to work. He knew how to keep what little he had in good working condition and he knew how to save. He knew the value of money. He was the direct opposite of lazy.

Coupled very tightly with his desire and will to do things himself was his strength. I kid you not, and although not proven, before my grandpa took really sick (last year) my grandpa could fairly easily destroy ANYONE in the family in a fight. His nickname growing up was "One Punch". Supposedly, the story goes, when he was younger he got in only one fight and with one punch he knocked the other kid clear off his feet, across the dirt road and unconscious. I'm not sure how much of it is true or how much of it is exaggerated but what a great story! To tell you the truth it's a believable story too! It was fun to try and "hurt" grandpa by squeezing his hand too hard when you greeted him (after a huge hug of course). He would look at you with a small grin on his face and say something to the effect of "are you ready?" (which of course you always thought you were until...) he would then squeeze your hand not in a way that hurt but somehow he would move your knuckles in a way that sent shock waves through your whole arm. No matter how old he got he always won that game. When we were younger he used to swing us on his leg (while singing the firewood song) or when there were more of us we used to cling to both of his legs as he walked around the house. He told stories of taking ALL the neighbourhood kids on "helicopter rides" where he would pick them up and swing them around his head until they were too dizzy to stand up. The kids would line up again and again and squeal with joy when it was their turn. Even with all that strength the thing that will stick with me is the fact that he NEVER used it to hurt anyone or to demand power over anyone, ever, period. He used his strength to do productive things and things that brought joy to others. With his great strength came extremely patience and kindness.            

He loved his family without limitations. He told us all the time that he was praying for us everyday and although lots of people say that I really believed him. My grandma and him were always ready with some short bread cookies (the best in the world) and bread with molasses and butter (depending on which way you ate is "grandma's way" or "grandpa's way" the butter would go on before or after the molasses). He never said he didn't have time for us. He was never upset even if we showed up completely unannounced. He really was the head of his household not in a dominating way but in a loving, example setting way. He was a man who was not ashamed of his faith and made it clear to all those around him whom he served and followed. He made it easy to be around him and to feel loved. He shared new insights into the faith we shared whenever he had them. He brought wisdom to ordinary everyday things such as gardening and devotions.

His funeral starts in one hour from now and although I can't physically be there I am there in thought. I haven't cried in a long, long time but writing this has brought me to tears.

There are very few people that can be called truly great people but my life seems to full of them. Frank Bishop, my awesome grandfather, was easily one of them.

I will miss him dearly.

Sister love

It's been three (3) days since my sister Shené and our friend Teleisha left for Canada. It was a fun visit packed full of new adventures. We have already talked about our zip lining fun and I honestly thought that would be the most adventurous thing I would do while down here.... but I was wrong.  On Sunday we went waterfall jumping!! For $15 we got to jump, slide and swim down 27 waterfalls and it included lunch!!! It was scary but amazing! Chris didn't come because he stayed behind and watched Abriel (such a good man).  It was sooo good I plan on taking Chris there before we leave.

Shené and Teleisha have both been to the DR on a missions trip 3 years ago. That was mostly a working trip so this time was a little different. We did some fun things and did some work. I think they appreciated the mix. They came to our tutoring sessions and met the students, they helped with some painting of the new school and we showed them around some villages they have never been to before. I sometimes feel weird just showing people some of the places because we are showing them peoples real lives.... not a museum or something.  Sometimes people can get a sense that if they have seen it or held some kids hand then they have made a difference and although it's a good start and it is important to see that the poverty is real you can't stop at just seeing.

We are so grateful for the time to spend with family and friends from back home! It means a lot to have people come down and hang out with us and see what we do first hand. You guys rock.

Something we have been facing since we started tutoring is a feeling of helplessness in some of our students lives.  A few of them have shared some things that are going on in their home lives, things like: no food to eat, being abused (physically and mentally) and having to work six or eight hours everyday after school and on weekends when they are in grades one to three.  It's a different life.... a different world.... a different culture and the rules of home don't apply here. I just want to pull them out of the situation and "save" them but it's not that easy.  We have also found out our sponsor girl, Maria, is having a hard time at school as a result of her home life.  She as made some accusations..... (ones that have made me cry and sicken me). We are going to be meeting with her and the school director to try to sort some stuff out and get to the bottom of things. We will update when we know more but if you are a praying person these kids need our prayers... and these parents need a wake up call.

Scott

I can’t believe how fast 12 days have gone by. Scott left this afternoon and it feels like we he just got here. It’s funny how we wait and wait for moments in life and then they are done and over with. My sister and Teliesha have been here for four days already. It’s been so nice having family around.  Even though we are around people all the time it can get lonely when you don’t get to see the familiar faces of your friends and family. It means a lot to us to have them come and share time with us.

I bet you’re all wondering what we have been up to with our visitors?? Hmmm??  The first two days of Scott’s visit were some relaxing and checking out the beach.  We showed Scott around a little and brought him to our favourite beach spot. He and Chris did a little snorkeling and they got some great pictures with our waterproof camera..... Unfortunately, water somehow got into the camera and ruined the memory card. So we lost all the pictures from that day as well as some videos of Abriel. I was sad for a couple days.... so much for waterproof!

At the school in Cangrejo we painted the fence around the shed and got Scott to help us teach some of our Spanish class. He is an excellent painter and was very good at "las vocales"! He was in charge of testing the kids to see if they had learned all the vowels properly. He took his position very seriously and even learned all the Spanish sayings he needed: "Como estas?" (How are you?); "Como te llamas?" (What is your name?); and "Como se dice?" (What is it?).

Scott painting the fence.

Chris painting the fence.

On Friday we went out as a group to Cevere, the spot where the new school will be. We painted and Francois built some walls. It looks so much better. A lot of the community was out to watch and some adults and kids even pitched in and helped. It was nice to see them excited and interested in the new school.  We will be going out again tomorrow (Friday) to complete most of it.

 Saturday was a blast! We hung out with Scott’s sponsor kid, Andrew, and Francois and Olivia’s sponsor kid, Sophia. We were suppose to bring our sponsor girl, Maria, but she had to spend a couple days in the hospital (we will be planning something special for her on another day).  We went go carting. All day go carting, bumper cars and a park for $10 a person! A highlight was when we took them to Burger King for lunch and Andrew drank a very large grape pop. I told him he would be peeing purple. A little while after he returned from the bathroom and announced “my pee was yellow!”.  Haha, so cute.

Scott's stomach and shoulder were not feeling great on Sunday afternoon.... and by Sunday night he was in enough pain to take him to the hospital. He ended up having to spend two nights there and get lots of tests (some of which were obviously necessary and others that seemed way out in left field; but I'm not a doctor). They think it could have been a mild pancreatic inflammation (of the shoulder?!?).  Whatever it was he recovered and got to experience a different side of the Dominican than most tourists get to see.

Tuesday afternoon we took Scott, Teleisha and Shene to the beach and did some more snorkeling.  For dinner we went to one of our favourite restaurants overlooking the ocean. Lots of fun.

Yesterday was amazing. We went zip lining and hung out with some monkey’s. I was so nervous and scared about zip lining but after making the first leap I wasn’t scared. It was awesome to be flying in the sky. We also had to do a free fall jump..... it took us girls about 15 minutes each to  get the courage to do it... but we did it and then we did it again!! SO MUCH FUN!!  The monkeys were kind of a disappointment because they had just ate and were not interested in coming to get the food from us. A few of the monkeys came and got a few pieces of food and climbed on us a bit. They were super cute. 

Last night we stayed home and played some games and got ready for Scott’s last day here. I asked Scott if he wanted to add anything to our blog about his experience here and he said,

“sponsor a kid; it goes to a good cause... I am serious.” 

Scott with his sponsor kid, Andrew, and his mom.

He also hopes everyone is as lucky as he was to meet his sponsor child.

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For more information or to sponsor a child that we work with, click the link below:
Servants Heart Ministries 

And thanks again for following us on this journey and supporting us with prayer or finances or just good wishes. We love you all!

Chris, Keeleah and Abriel

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